Saturday, March 14, 2009

Creating the Relationship You Desire - Do You Know What You Really Want?

Creating healthy and loving relationships should be easy but for many it seems that relationships get messed up and end in separation or divorce. Why are relationships so difficult? It is because we need to know what kind of relationships we really want, so we flow as a couple instead of banging our heads together for control.

The old adage 'know your self' is important in relationships. You have to know what you want in a relationship in order to nurture and develop it. So here are some questions and tips for you to bring clarity and understanding of your relationships. They may assist you as you create the relationship you dream about.

Relationship Questions

1. What does 'love' mean to me?
2. What qualities of love do I want in a relationship?
3. What are the positive qualities of your partner that attracted you to him/her?
4. What is your partner's behavior reflecting back to you about yourself?
5. Are you trying to change your partner's behavior?
6. What thoughts nurture a relationship?
7. Can you let go of trying to 'control' your partner?
8. How can you share with your partner?
9. Is your heart open to truly love and be loved or do you have some baggage to let go?
10. Are you loving and respecting of yourself?
11. What changes can you make to bring more peace into your life?

Relationship Tips

- Focus on what you want, rather than on what you do not want.
- Only say good things about someone.
- You cannot change another person, but you can transform yourself.
- When your heart truly opens to love, your 'poor me' feelings leave.
- Respect your partner's right to choose what he/she wants to do.
- Enjoy time on your own to explore your creative side.
- Love yourself everyday and shine as brightly as you can.
- Embrace your personal power - you are in charge of how you feel and what you do in every moment.
- Create a loving relationship where there are 'spaces' for each one to create, to love and to flow...
- Forgive yourself and your partner ... each day is a new beginning.
- Say 'Yes" to peace in your life and make some changes. To have peace in your life, simply be peaceful!
- When you inner self is calm, it is reflected in your outer world.

By Jane Booth Robertson